Travelogue :  Kyvan's Southeast Asia Adventure

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I was not going to pay corrupt Communist customs officers $5 just to have them see my passport. I refused. I rejected that advice and went with the tactic of being so ignorant in Vietnamese that they would think I was such a shame they would let me go. It worked.

Officer: Toi nay anh o dau?
Me: (feigning distraction) Oh, I'm sorry, excuse me?
Officer: Where are you staying tonight?
Me: Oh, Ho Chi Minh, not sure of the hotel yet, but I'll find one once I get into town.

So this young girl let me through and that was that. I heard horror stories of passport officials making Vietnamese-Americans wait for hours unless they pay up. Many are familiar with the system enough to just slip $5 into their passport. Apparently, the VC want to keep a record on where people stay and so this documentation must occur at each location that you reside. And for some reason, each front desk wants to keep your passport overnight for this documentation. But to prevent the scam of bribing me for the return of my passport, I ask them to do it right there on the spot.

I knew the weather in Saigon and Southeast Asia was going to hit me hard as I had been to Bangkok four years earlier. Exiting the airport terminal, I walked into thick, viscous humidity fueled by the tropical heat and the evaporated sweat of 80 million Vietnamese people. I met my sister and mom in Saigon who were waiting among a sea of anxious people looking towards the terminal exit. They flew in from Los Angeles and we made plans to meet in Vietnam. My mom has never been back to Vietnam since she escaped exactly 30 years ago when South Vietnam fell to the communists in 1975. As for sis and me, it was our first time. Previous to this, we had only heard stories. None to the detail I would like in terms of description. I was going to find out for myself.

Well sis went into a stream of consciousness account of how chaotic this country was, and how she is amazed she did not die in the traffic, and how it smells like Autopia (the Disneyland car ride known for the lingering smell of exhaust surrounding it.) But other than this, she feels like it's going to be an amazing adventure here.

 
Nov 16, 2005
Good Morning Vietnam!!!
Day 1
 

I asked a lot of people about Vietnam to prepare and to my astonishment, nobody prepared me for the most striking thing about Saigon - it is severely and grossly polluted!!! Here, we live in a shroud of everlasting smog - a smog that sears your lungs and burns your eyes as freshly cut onions would. It is worse than I ever imagined. Worse than Los Angeles. Now that's bad...

We ate breakfast at Cho Ben Thanh where we ate banh bot loc (small, clear doughy pillows filled with shrimp), banh beo (flattened cakes topped with dry shredded shrimp), mi quang (yellow noodles with shrimp, bean sprouts, and other Vietnamese herbs, and three fresh, chilled coconuts chopped open to drink. All for about US$2.45. We will never go hungry in Asia....

So we decided to take cyclos through the city for a nice relaxed pace as the chaotic traffic sped by us. We had negotiated for 3 cyclos 10,000 VND each to Nha Tho Duc Ba (Notre Dame Cathedral). And when we got to the church, as one should expect, there was a misunderstanding. Apparently, they thought they were getting paid $10 US dollars each. That's funny! So we gave them 20,000 VND each and went our way. Even though we spoke to them in Vietnamese, this type of "misunderstanding" will come very often.

I took pictures of the church which has been here before my mom's time. There were numerous people praying in front of the statue of Mary, which has been witnessed crying. No funny stuff happened this time.

Eventually we went to Song Saigon (Saigon River) looking for a way to get to Vung Tau. Song Saigon is THE place for couples. The atmosphere was fairly romantic, and I say "fairly" because we were still in a polluted city with honking traffic right behind us. The couples were facing the river which reflected neon light. Rose sellers were lurking among the couples trying to sell to the men, because if they didn't buy, they would look like cheap losers. A little girl was selling us lotto tickets and mom said, "We don't live here, why would we buy lotto tickets?" With an irresistible smile, the girl said, "Co cho con tien di..." (please give me money then.) So of course we gave her some. Her name was Phuong and she was 13 but looked 9. She was helpful actually. She told us where we could board the boat for Vung Tau.